Our country's deficit currently sits at over 10 trillion dollars. So why, when discussing balancing the budget, do we primarily focus on privatizing save points and healing stations (under the guise of “reform”) while simultaneously defunding valuable social services? It's sad that the politicians in Washington heavily favor legislation that drastically lowers taxes for the rich stars of video games and puts the bulk of the burden on the backs of the nation's working-class and non-playable characters.
Congress’s recently passed budget drastically cuts funding for public education. As a result, many game series are considering eliminating instruction manuals completely -- which puts a heavy strain on the tutorial levels. Instead of punishing young players for wanting to invest in their future, we should be looking at the top scorers and how much, or little, they contribute.
A typical plumber in the Mushroom Kingdom easily makes at least five figures in coins, yet pays practically nothing in local or federal taxes. The idea that they're just average Joes who are going to use that money to create more jobs is ridiculous. A recent survey of the area's plumbers found that virtually all of them spend the majority of their income on excessive amounts of 1UPs, even when they don't need them. These guys need to start paying their fare share. Let’s end their tax cuts.
Another thing we need to look at is closing the tax loopholes for role-playing characters. Mages, warriors, Pokémon trainers, etc. all make pretty decent money through level grinding and adventuring. The current system allows them to write-off all of the cash, weapons, armor, and rare gems they earn and doesn't require them to report the substantial gains they make by selling those same items to the next town for a profit.
The pundits try to spin it by saying those heroes need an incentive to fight the tough and final bosses, and if they had to pay taxes on swag and loot, they would all quit playing before even reaching the final area. Whatever happened to wanting to beat the game for bragging rights? Is saving the world not good enough anymore? It's a disgrace to even call these people "heroes" when all they care about are rewards and experience points for themselves and their party.
Lastly, we as a nation should examine our involvement in and funding of these never-ending war games. The American taxpayers are shelling out millions of points a day to continue these conflicts. True, our troops should have adequate weapons and equipment for when they go online. But do they really need all of those customizable face paints and accessories?
It's time to start being smart and practical about our tax policy and spending in order to seriously tackle this deficit. We've asked the poor, elderly, and working-class characters to sacrifice enough already. Now, we need the rich and those better off to do their part for the sake of our consoles -- err, country.
(Happy tax day.)
