Having a bunch of hardened soldiers meet in an idyllic nuclear family's home is just as silly as making a machinima video about a massive stat tracking network. Oh, wait....

Video Blips:

• Self-professed Call of Duty Elite spokesman "theLEGENDofKARL" conducts a metaphor-filled Q&A session on the online service's various features. I think this is the first time I've ever heard a disclaimer invalidating a pony as a subscriber perk.

Hit that "Read More" button for Prototype 2's hot tentacle action, the industrial decay of Metro: Last Light, and Bastion's artful launch trailer.

• Sure, Prototype 2's James Heller possesses enough brute strength in his fists, but that's nothing compared to sprouting tendrils like an Akira reject. I now see why the ladies constantly ask him for his "party favor."

• Shooting out lightbulbs and unwitting guards in Metro: Last Light is par for the course, but everything changes once a bulky minigun appears. Why is it hidden in the factory foreman's office, you ask? Why, it's a "dispersal tool" for those unionized bastar -- er, workers, of course!

• Bastion combines an anime visual style with a dynamic, throaty voice-over -- and plenty of alcohol. I think developer Supergiant Games actually stumbled upon a formula with a mathematical equivalent to, "Take my money."