Shelved is a series of articles about games that never came out, along with some useful information that you probably didn't know. Enjoy!
Thrill Kill, commonly mispelled, was actually titled Thrill Mill.
Ominous.
Story
The game centered around a mill worker, Sam "Buffalo" Jones and his wife, Loretta, and their relationship. Or rather, their lack of one. Basically, Buffalo would try and bring home as much money as possible so Loretta could stay home and bake him pie. The developers thought that everyone loved pie, but that wasn't the case. Eighty-five percent of people prefer cake to pie. Also, seventy-six percent of statistics are made up on the spot.
Buffalo was working three jobs, which meant that he was able to move around to three different levels, but only after completing certain tasks. Many of the tasks were mundane crate-moving minigames that involved matching colors and shapes.
The developers were trying to market the game to children, originally. When that fell through they forgot to take out the simple puzzles, but also didn't add any fun. An important lesson the developers learned the hard way.
But back to the levels.
Each level in the game is owned by one of Buffalo's brothers-in-law. The first level, Lumber Yard, has Buffalo stacking lumber onto conveyor belts. It was kind of like Tetris, but not really. The second level, Super Swing Set allowed Buffalo to push small children on swings. The police would come and drag you off to the final level, Happy Mill. This level was more like survival-horror, but without guns.
Thrill Mills Happy Mill level. See? Just like survival-horror.
Gameplay
Thrill Mill's gameplay consisted of memorizing button combinations and inputting them when appropriate. For example, the player would have to remember the button combination for jumping (X,X,Triangle, Circle, Square, R2) to, whilst playing the Lumber Yard level, jump from the log on the conveyor belt, to the ground. If the player made a mistake, Buffalo would fall down and be pushed along the conveyor belt towards the blade.
Buffalo's twig and berries would be in obvious peril, so in order to help him stand back up, the player would have to input the button combination for rising (Down, Down, Down). If the player failed to do that, Buffalo would be sawn in two. You'd think it would be a Game Over screen at this point, but Buffalo was incredibly resilient.
Using the newest (for the time) technology of the dual analog sticks, the player would have to guide both sides of Jones back towards each other. Then, when both halves were close enough, the player would have to press the appropriate button combination (Left, Right, Left, Right, Select, R3).
After completing Lumber Yard, the player would move on to Super Swing Set, which was actually just story filler. Buffalo would push some children on the swings, testing them out (the swings, not the children). A police officer would drive by and think Buffalo was touching them inappropriately (the children, not the swings). He argues with the cop and, since the cop's wife just left him for a carney, sends poor Buffalo to the loony bin.
The final level, Happy Mill, serves as the main portion of the game. It was more of a rythm-action game at this point, as the player had to keep a beat in their head and move Buffalo around the insane asylum, avoiding the other "patients" at all costs. I say keep the beat in their head because Thrill Mill featured absolutely no music. It was Dance Dance Revolution mat compatible.
What went wrong?
Most people agree it was the nonsense button combinations, but some speculate that the story was based on Shane Bettenhausen's sordid life, which is why the game never saw the light of day.
Fun Fact
As a side note, McDonalds actually sued the makers of Thrill Mill for including the level Happy Mill. Parents were easily confused and preordered the game thinking it would include a cheap, plastic toy for their child, along with some french fries. McDonalds later lost the case because the game was never released, and the judge acknowledged that people are dumb. The judge was later found in a pond wearing cement shoes. Apparently even dumb people know when they're being made fun of.
