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Confession time: I haven't done much gaming for fun in the months since the 1UP layoffs. Oh, sure -- I've dabbled in a little Dragon Quest V here, some Retro Game Challenge there. (The fact that I associate games with losing my job probably doesn't help matters, either!) But I haven't been truly addicted to a game since Persona 4 late last year. I've been extremely busy working on localization projects recently, and a lot of my "gaming" time these days is focused on making sure sentences don't overflow text boxes. Still, like all of us, I do have my share of free time. But I think it's telling that even I -- probably one of the few dudes who can honestly say that Resident Evil plotlines "enthrall" him -- haven't "found the time" to crack open my copy of Resident Evil 5.

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As the Mailbag works its way ever so closer to its regular Thursday posting slot, we tackle Trico, maturing games, and a magazine staple: the prison letter. Want to see your thoughts on our green screen? E-mail us at letters@bitmob.com.

-Lance D.

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Funny thing. One of the most common complaints from people in my line of work: We don't have enough time to play games. Sure, we have review games to review. But we also have articles to edit, people to interview, websites to build, crazy people to ban from those websites, and impromptu games of Decapitato to play. The other problem -- get ready to break out the tiny air violins and Kleenex -- we often get so many games at once, that we can't keep up.

So last night, I'm sitting at home, staring at my recently arrived copies of X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Raiden Fighters Aces, and Punch-Out!!, wondering how I can play and cover them in the most efficient, least time-consuming way possible. I came up with this -- the three lessons for the game industry that I got from playing these three games for three minutes each:

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Here we go again: Kojima Productions is back with another teaser. This isn't fair -- we're telling, Konami.

News Blips:

• Kojima Productions teaser teases another teaser that teases...oh, god -- not again! Yes, the Metal Gear maker's cryptic website has yet another countdown clock that is sure to cause more joy. Or frustration. Probably frustration, but we're amused with the shameless leg-pulling. All signs point to E3 for the big reveal, but at this point, we wouldn't be surprised if Kojima himself announces the surprise is actually a Metal Gear-themed calculator wristwatch. Hey, it adds up to us. [1UP]

• Size does matter: Guinness World Records awards Fuel for being really, really long. The open-world racer from publisher Codemasters received an award for being the biggest console game in history for having 5,560 fake, videogame miles of land available for players to aimlessly drive on until they either get bored or run out of fuel -- whichever comes first. Pretty impressive, we must say. But, uh, Guinness must have never played the Design Mode in Excitebike -- that track never ends...literally. [Joystiq]

• Capcom calls for new mobile games, iPhone picks up. The Japanese company confirmed it will be developing over 10 games for Apple's fancy talking device throughout the rest of this fiscal year (which ends in March, 2010). No word on what games they'll be making, but we'd guess we'll see at least one two three four five Mega Man games. [Kotaku]

• People play videogames, it's true. In case you didn't know this, the research group NPD released stats that say 63 percent of the people surveyed play videogames, while only 53 percent watch movies. And, shockingly, only 1 percent rollerblade while knitting. Strange. [1UP]

Hit the jump for some video blips, including a new Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 trailer, Prototype bosses deemed brutal, Half-Life 2 magnets, and...more.

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This is the first new Heavy Rain footage since the Leipzig Games Convention 2008, and it's a full two-and-a-half minutes of gameplay, extra heavy on the quicktime events. Think it looks as good as last time?

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Editor's Note: We try to avoid regular previews as much as possible on Bitmob, because almost every site does those already and it's unlikely that you guys can get your hands on games early unless you're part of the gaming press. We're making an exception here, though; Neo Steam is a game you probably don't know much about (we didn't, at least), and Derek has logged hours in the closed beta. -Demian 

I had the opportunity to take part in a 2,000-person closed beta for Atlus' first contribution to the saturated free-to-play MMO market, Neo Steam: The Shattered Continent. While I've played several FTP MMOs in the past and none of them ever succeeded in holding my attention for more than a few days, the fact that this game is from Atlus kind of excited me.

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When I was looking over last week's April NPD numbers, one game jumped out at me: Pokémon Platinum Edition, checking in with sales of a nifty 433K. OK, the fact that a new Pokémon game has cleaned up on the charts isn't surprising in the least. (Still, approaching half a million units in one month -- wow.)

But it made me think of how badly I misjudged this series. When Pikachu and Co. bounded onto the scene in the late '90s with Pokémon Red and Blue versions, I wasn't surprised. To me, it seemed like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for a younger generation. Hearing that it all stemmed from a good game didn't dissuade me too much from brushing it off as a fad.

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Pigs are ruining our lives. Not only are they responsible for the current flu frenzy, but they're also responsible for the sequel to one of our favorite zombie games missing this year's Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3). To show our anger, we're declaring today: Eat-Bacon-Until-You-Puke Day.

News Blips:

• Cue Alanis Morissette's "Ironic:" Dead Rising 2 will not be shown at next month's E3 due to swine flu. Apparently zombies can get the piggy pukes, too. Or at least the people making a game about rotting, flesh-eaters -- Capcom has confirmed that Dead Rising 2's producer, Keiji Inafune, and other staff members will not be attending next month's trade show due to the flu outbreak. Because of this, the game will be quarantined until it's deemed safe to show. Way to go, piglet -- thanks for ruining the show for us. [Kotaku]

• Rockstar founders find a company on street, give it a new home/name. The folks responsible for Grand Theft Auto have started a new company entitled 4mm Games. Maybe they'll announce some games at E3. That is, if the pigs don't get them to first... [Destructoid]

• THQ waste money for our amusement. The publisher let the world know it's sending the Queen of England a gold-plated Wii and a copy of Big Family Games. That's a smart idea. If you're an idiot. [Joystiq]

• Who buys Watchmen downloadable games at retail? You, maybe. Because, well, you can -- 1UP confirmed both episodes of the Watchmen downloadable titles will soon be compiled on a disc just in time for the film's DVD/Blu-ray release. If you actually do decide to pick this up, please adhere to store policy and wear some frickin' pants. [1UP]

Hit the jump for some video blips, including a totally-not-out-of-focus Blur trailer, real life Super Mario Bros., yarn Metroids, and...more.

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It's with The Geekbox's Sweet 16 episode that we give this most excellent podcast the keys to what we hope is a long and prosperous partnership. Some of you may be wondering just what The Geekbox is all about. Those people should not go to the official Geekbox site and click on "About The Geekbox," because all you'll get is the autobiography of founder Ryan Scott. Instead, let us fill you in.

The Geekbox is an all-things-geek podcast, in which a handful of nerds -- led by former 1UP/Computer Gaming World editor Ryan Scott -- talk about anything and everything geek chic. Think Star Trek nitpicking, Lost dissertations, the pros and cons of comic scribe Grant Morrison, Andrew Fitch's frustrating dating "adventures," and yes, videogames. Give it a shot and let us know what you think.

The Geekbox RAW EDITION -- Episode 16 (2009-05-20)
Wherein we discuss Bitmob's launch, the Lost season 5 finale (big spoiler warning!), Greg Ford's desire to kick Sabretooth's ass, Greg's take on Star Trek (more spoilers), Gabrielle Anwar's potential summer wardrobe, the awesomeness of the new Punch-Out!!, and our new World of Warcraft recruitment drive. This experimental episode is raw and uncut -- every awkward pause and weird comment is fully intact for your enjoyment! Starring Ryan Scott, Karen Chu, Andrew Fitch, Greg Ford, and Ryan Higgins.
Running Time: 1h 12m 16s

Direct Download (right click save as)

RSS

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Have a look at some of the great stuff written and created by Bitmobbers that you may have missed over the last few days...we've got everything from Plants vs. Zombies reviews (multiple) to a confession about crying at the sight of Pac-Man. (And don't forget to click 'Read more' to see the complete list.)

Intermissions
This humor series by Brett Bates is well worth checking out. Recent posts include Army of Two and a Half (think Army of Two meets Three Men and a Baby) and Power Surge Causes Kojima Countdown Timer to Reset.

Bitmob Community Podcast
Trevor H (hey what's the rest of that last name, Trevor?) is looking into starting a Bitmob community podcast. All you aspiring Robert Ashleys out there, here's your chance! We'd love to see this plan come together.

Plants vs. Zombies Review
I'm a little late to the party on this game myself (just started playing a couple days ago, and wish I was playing right now), but luckily others are more quick on the draw. Allistair Pinsof's review is linked above, and Eric Majkut's is right here.

Top Five Videogame-Inspired Music Videos
Top X lists are to blame for most of man's ills, but I enjoyed this one from Allistair Pinsof. I think this Architecture in Helsinki video is my favorite.

What is Your Earliest Gaming Memory?
Eric King poses the above question and then reveals that he used to cry when Pac-Man ate a power pellet and the ghosts turned blue. Anyone else have embarrassing confessions to make?

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If I'm understanding the official King of Fighters website correctly, the series is up to 2,004 games now. That sounds about right -- over the past few years, hasn't a new edition come out every three days or so? And we old-timers used to make fun of Street Fighter....

Oh wait, "2003" was a year, not a chapter count. OK, so I admit, I'm not the world's biggest KOF expert. But even though the series isn't at 2000+ titles, 12 is still a big number by anyone's count. Big enough that seeing a demo of The King of Fighters 12, due out this July for the PS3 and 360, wasn't really that high on our priority list here on Bitmob.

That is, until we found out who was doing the demo.

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Editor's Note: Funny, I also can't beat Mike Tyson either. But unlike Michael, I gave up a long-ass time ago. I mean, he's just so hard to beat. It's like he's made of iron or something. Y'know what? They should call him that:"Iron" Mike Tyson. What's that? They do? It's official: I'm a genius. -Michael

I am nearly twenty six years old and have been playing videogames as long as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is playing Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!; another is grabbing the lit end of a sparkler on the 4th of July. I have played Punch-Out!! on and off over the years and have always been thwarted by Super Macho Man.

I have never made it to the titular heavyweight champ in my life. I have never used a cheat to fight Tyson. To me, the game will end when I have beaten Super Macho Man. The closest to victory over him I've had was knocking him down twice a few years ago. He is always where my play session ends -- once I lose I throw in the towel. Even if I start playing an hour later, I start over at Glass Joe. I suspect I do this to reassure my ego that I don't suck at the game.

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