22 Years Later, I Can Not Beat Mike Tyson's Punch-Out

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Saturday, May 16, 2009

Editor's Note: Funny, I also can't beat Mike Tyson either. But unlike Michael, I gave up a long-ass time ago. I mean, he's just so hard to beat. It's like he's made of iron or something. Y'know what? They should call him that:"Iron" Mike Tyson. What's that? They do? It's official: I'm a genius. -Michael


I am nearly twenty six years old and have been playing videogames as long as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is playing Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!; another is grabbing the lit end of a sparkler on the 4th of July. I have played Punch-Out!! on and off over the years and have always been thwarted by Super Macho Man.

I have never made it to the titular heavyweight champ in my life. I have never used a cheat to fight Tyson. To me, the game will end when I have beaten Super Macho Man. The closest to victory over him I've had was knocking him down twice a few years ago. He is always where my play session ends -- once I lose I throw in the towel. Even if I start playing an hour later, I start over at Glass Joe. I suspect I do this to reassure my ego that I don't suck at the game.

 

This mental or hand-eye coordination block only applies to the original Punch-Out. I became rather adept at Super Punch-Out!! when that was released on the SNES later in my life. I can easily beat all opponents in that game, including my rival Super Macho Man. I relished beating him repeatedly, although the feeling wasn't without tarnish. I may be able to beat him in Super Punch-Out!!, but his unquestioned dominance over me in the first game still gnaws at my player's senses of self-competitiveness, achievement, and completionism.

I believe my experiences with Punch-Out!! early in my life formed the foundation of my mentality as a player. Be patient; do not dismiss a game until you understand its rules. It can take multiple play attempts before you understand the game and you start having fun. Do not obsess over beating a game, or others in multiplayer, so that playing it is no longer fun.

Mostly, I'm just glad to have played Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! -- it's one of the milestones of my life and my hobby of gaming. It caught me at a young age and amazed, amused, and intrigued me so much that it almost single-handedly cemented in my psyche that I would play games my entire life.


 
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Comments (15)
2
May 17, 2009
Honestly, if you're starting all the way back at Glass Joe every time you lose, you're probably handicapping yourself more than anything else. It's much easier to get the patterns down if you don't have to waste a couple of hours on dudes you've already beaten before reaching the main attraction, so to speak. Heck, just having to start that particular circuit over again (as the game forces you to do) is bad enough. And those last few fighters are so powerful they don't leave much room for error. The game has a password function. Using it to skip ahead to the man, himself, may be morally questionable, but there's no shame in continuing from a circuit you've reached through honest toil. But, if you think Macho Man's bad, just wait till you meet Tyson. You ain't seen nothin' yet.
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May 17, 2009
At this point, it's not really even about beating Super Macho Man. I'm still annoyed whenever I get beat by him, but I've almost reached a zen-like acceptance of it. The sky is blue, the grass is green, and I lose to Super Macho Man. The day I beat Macho, I will either get to Tyson and get knocked out immediately, or simply turn off the NES and be at peace knowing I've finally defeated him.
Demian_-_bitmobbio
May 18, 2009
"The sky is blue, the grass is green, and I lose to Super Macho Man." Haha words to live by.
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May 20, 2009
I'm the same way about starting from the beginning after every game over screen. I don't agree with Joey White, I've tried using the passwords to go straight to the top circuit and almost always do worse for some reason. Maybe it's just some sort of mental block, but I gave up on it. But, I like this. It's more about excepting your shortcomings so you can move past them.
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May 20, 2009
Thanks for sharing your story. You're right about not obsessing to the point of unfun - sometimes I find myself doing that, which isn't why I play games in the first place. Great post.
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May 20, 2009
The owner of the video game store I'm employed for (a fairly successful indie chain in CNY) is apparently some sort of guru for Punch Out, going so far as to wager with onlookers if he can defeat Tyson/Mr. Dream or not. Word is he always wins. Moral of the story: business management skills and Nintendo boxing go hand-in-hand.
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May 21, 2009
The best part of losing to one of the later characters is starting over and just pummeling Glass Joe to take out your frustrations.
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May 21, 2009
I just have to repeat the mantra! "The sky is blue, the grass is green, and I lose to Super Macho Man."
Brett_new_profile
May 21, 2009
Michael, I thought you'd like to know that your post is featured in today's Entertainment Consumers Association newsletter. Nice work!
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May 21, 2009
Great story. Punch-Out and Burgertime both haunt me to this day.
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May 21, 2009
i will never forget the day i beat mike tysons punchout that was one of the greatest achievments, to be the first of my friends and i that beat it..... god i miss those days
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May 22, 2009
I never beat the game either. Hell, I don't even think I got as far as you did, Michael. Yet Punch Out remains one of my all-time favorites. It's a great game to play with friends, passing the controller around the room until you're able to move on.
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March 01, 2010

Sorry about the re-post, I was pressing buttons in the new profile interface.

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March 01, 2010

Super Macho Man is who I wanted to be when I grew up.  So bad.

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March 01, 2010

Holy hell... did I write this and change my name Michael Wade. You just described my entire life. I love Punch-Out!! and I still try to beat that bastard to this day. 

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