Editor's note: It looks like we've got a new comedic voice on Bitmob. Thomas' story about Will Smith's song "Wild Wild West" is probably one of the funniest things I've read in a long time. Just thinking about it makes me laugh. -James

Most gamers could easily rattle off a list of famous gunslingers who would fit perfectly into the gritty world of Red Dead Redemption: Jeremiah Johnson, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Grizzly Adams, Wild Bill Hickok, and anyone Clint Eastwood has ever played. The list goes on. But why stop there? If Rockstar is ready to throw zombies into the mix, let’s pull out all the stops and consider any and every character who's ever made his home on the range as potential DLC fodder. Here’s my own personal "wanted" list of outlaws, banditos, cowboys, and quick draws.

Hit the jump to check out the round up.

10) Brisco County Jr. -- Brisco County Jr.

Long before Carlton Cuse became a Comic-Con staple as the executive producer of Lost, he was already immortalizing himself to nerds everywhere by cocreating a sci-fi western starring Bruce Campbell. Running for 27 episodes in the early 90s, the series is a loopy mixture of classic western, slapstick comedy, and science fiction serial that involves ghosts, time travel, rocket cars, and a mysterious orb.

Much like anything graced by Bruce Campbell’s chin, the show is a cult hit full of memorable characters and self-aware gags -- the pilot alone somehow manages to pull off the classic Wile E. Coyote "landscape painted on a brick wall" goof with a straight face. But don't let the jokes fool you. Brisco County Jr. tells an engaging story, too. I’m already of a mind that Bruce Campbell improves anything (movies, TV shows, soup) with his presence, so why should a video game be any different?

 9) Doc Brown -- Back to the Future 3

If there was a jail for nerds in the future and you had J-U-L-E-S and V-E-R-N-E tattooed on your fists, introducing people to them would certainly get you a lot of cred.

Speaking of science fiction and westerns, what could be better than adding Dr. Emmett Brown and the rest of the 1885-era Back to the Future 3 cast to Red Dead Redemption? For all of Christopher Lloyd’s poor acting choices afterward -- My Favorite Martian and Camp Nowhere spring to mind -- the character of Doc Brown has enough charisma to forgive any later transgressions.

Think of the possibilities: a new all-acoustic soundtrack of ZZ Top and Huey Lewis covers, hovering steam trains equipped with flux capacitors, shootouts with Buford “Mad Dog” Tannen, winning the heart of Clara Clayton, and all the manure carts you can handle. Despite its reputation as “the Back to the Future movie everyone likes the least but is inexplicably on TV the most,” the third entry has a lot of redeeming qualities.

8) Woody -- Toy Story

The soothing voice of Tom Hanks and the plump body of present-day Tim Allen?  All my dreams have come true.

You didn’t think these would all be real flesh-and-blood cowboys, did you? If this choice offends you, I suggest you go no further, gentle reader, for what lies ahead is sure to make you groan.

Anyway, if you saw Toy Story 3 this summer and didn’t have your goddamn heart warmed to capacity then you are a monster, plain and simple. Woody’s diminutive size could be troublesome to incorporate into the game, so using the latest in computer technology, I’ve prepared the picture above to demonstrate what a life-sized Woody might look like.

Other features of the Woody’s Roundup DLC pack include a new soundtrack featuring Randy Newman narratting your character’s actions to a bouncy piano, a new mount in the form of Bullseye, an Etch-a-Sketch shootout mode, and a brand-new villain. Hint: It’s Six Shooter from Puppet Master 3!

Not quite as good as Retro Puppet Master, but hey man, the remote is all the way over there, and I'm sure nothing better is on anyway.

7) Wylie Burp -- An American Tail: Fievel Goes West

“I’ve been doggin’ a dog ’til the dogs come home tryin’ to dog my dog-eared pup copy of Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch. Also, dogs.” -Wylie Burp

In his final role, James Stewart voiced Wylie Burp, a legendary soldier who went on to fight as a member of The Boss’s elite Cobra Unit in Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater. During the events of Fievel Goes West, he oversees numerous training montages and offers helpful quotes that sound like a Mad Lib with the word "dog" filled in for every noun and verb. As in: “I’m tired of leading a dog’s life and fightin’ like cats and dogs against cats and dogs. A young pup’s doggin’ my trail tryin’ to become top dog. I’m going to the dogs in a dog eat dog world, son.”

He’s mostly known for ridding the Old West of something called the Cactus Cat Gang and helping Fievel prevent the insidious mouse burgers plot.

6) The Stranger -- The Big Lebowski

The greatest mustache on film.

Providing a narrative bookend for The Dude’s adventures, The Stranger (played by Sam Elliott’s mustache) would be a perfect addition to the world of Red Dead Redemption. Downloading his DLC would add meandering narration to the beginning and end of John Marston’s story, an opportunity to drink White Russians with The Stranger in any saloon, roving posses of nihilists to battle with, and a special “Bar Eats You/You Eat Bar” all-or-nothing hunting mode.

He also pops up in the corner of the screen, à la Dan “Toasty” Forden, to issue a gentle complaint any time a character cusses. (You cannot disable this feature.)

Continue to page two for the shocking conclusion!